I am my own worst critic by far! Someone could tell me several times that they love a song I wrote but I would still question whether it's really good. I do try to keep in mind that "good" is a relative term and subjective to the listener, but anytime an artist puts something creative "out there", they make themselves vulnerable to criticism and that is scary.
I never really intended for any of my songs to be heard, mainly because I thought
they were too simple. I would often find it difficult to finish a song.
Subconsciously I felt, “If I don’t finish this song, then I won’t have to play it for anybody, right?” Crazy I know, but that is what it's like to be a perfectionist - it can be very paralyzing.
I finally got the courage, mostly through my husband's prompting, to play a song or two for friends, family, & church. It was only after repeatedly hearing comments such as: "Where can I download that?", “Can I find that on You Tube?", "You should make a recording because your music needs to be heard!"...did I ever start to believe that making a recording was something I needed to take seriously.
When I finally did make the decision to record, I was just going to do it for friends and family. It wasn't until I nervously got into the studio, and Eric started working his magic, that I began to feel it might be something I could "put out there" for others to hear and enjoy.
Now, talk about SCARY! It took about a year of reading "how to" books, listening to podcasts and biographies by people that have overcome hard things, to even drum up the courage to release my little EP. Just seeing a picture of myself on the internet would freak me out! I wasn’t comfortable with social media and have never wanted to come across as self-promoting. All that, wrapped up within each step of this process involving huge learning curves, has required a lot of perseverance and determination, all the while overcoming self doubt.
I am here to say that it CAN be done and you are never
too old to start!!! Just remember that dreams usually
walk around wearing overalls, not so much looking
like pots of gold at the end of a rainbow! Ha!
The feedback I have received from the release of "Eternal Light" has taken me quite by surprise! NOTHING means more to me than hearing a person say that my music has brought peace in their stressful day, or to see someone sit in tears as I play a song for them. Those moments have made all the "overcoming" worth it.
In the end, that is what every musician hopes for when they perform or create music - that it will touch the listener emotionally, spiritually, or even physically. I am thankful if I can play a tiny part in that for you. Thank you for following along on the journey!
Welcome to my Blog! I would love to hear from you!